Public speaking is my number one biggest fear. Hands down. I hate it. I would rather fly to Australia with a plane full of vampire bats.
I once agreed to speak at Union College at a “job fair” (in my mind, I thought it was going to be like a science fair. I brought a card table, and a table cloth, and menus, and stuff to show all the kids what I do for a living.) But it was in a lecture hall, and I was told to stand up in front of about 300 people, including 12 other alumni on the panel who had, like, serious jobs. I was told to explain a) why I went to Union. b) what I majored in. c) why my major helped me to prepare for what I did now. and d.) what advice I have for students. I was last to go out of all 12 people, and let me put it this way, I fell apart. My speech was so bad and I was such a total nervous wreck, that one of the female students got up from the audience and walked up on the stage and gave me a hug! I’m not kidding. Afterwards, we were supposed to break off into a separate classroom, and students interested in my career would come to that room to speak to me. Not one single person showed up. :(
Fast forward 8 years. I get an email from Mike Huber, head of the TU Blogging department, asking me to speak in front of his college journalism class. I told Mike that I didn’t want to do it because the thought of doing it made me want to vomit. But I figured I need to do more things like this, otherwise, I’m never gonna get over it.
I wish.
So tonight I went to speak in front of Mike’s class with my friend (and author of Bombers Burrito Blog) Pete Corcoran. Pete came for moral and technical support (The plan was, he was going to take over when I have a panic attack and have to walk backwards out of the classroom and into my car and drive away.)
I will say this. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. I drank a gallon of camomile tea before and during the class which helped. And those kids (they’re in college, so I’m assuming “kids” is ok?)… those KIDS asked me a ZILLION questions. At one point, one of the girls asked me if I had a girlfriend (I was like, “oh shit”) and my vision got a little blurry and I thought I was going to pass out. But it was fine. They asked a ton of questions, and I answered them all honestly. And then Mike told me they will all be blogging about the “interview” for their assignment. That should be interesting. I kind of wish I wasn’t SOO honest. (Totally off the subject, umm, if you read their blogs and they all just happen to unanimously blog about me saying that I don’t like being a restaurant owner, don’t listen to them. I never said it. Those kids are LIARS!)
As I was leaving, Mike Huber gave me a “parting gift” which was a book. I opened it in the car and the book is called, “STAGE FRIGHT; 40 Stars Tell You How They Beat America’s #1 Fear“. Thank you, Mike, that was very thoughtful. Now will you please link FridayPuppy.com on the Times Union blogs? Pleeeeeeeaaase?
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thanks for coming to our class, i think it’s safe to say we all thought you did a great job
Matt gets an A+ for tonight’s talk. If you didn’t bitch and moan so much beforehand, I’d never have suspected you didn’t like speaking in front of groups. I’m telling you, you’re a natural.
I’ll forward the blog posts when the students write them up. It’ll be interesting to read 23 separate accounts of your talk.
Thanks again for doing something that’s not entirely comfy. Well done.
Mike
PS. When I first read your blog title, I could swear it said, “Fear of Public Spanking” and I thought, ‘oh, that’s a bad typo!’
I agree, you were really good. And we ask a lot of questions becasue were jounalist..thats what we do. haha
It is never fun to speak in front of people; but remember you always know more about your topic than anyone in the audience do; and new information is always fun to give to people. I’m sure you did great, I’ll be sure to have you talk to some of my “people”. We’ll talk!
As one of the most self conscious people you will ever meet, often having a hard time eating in front of other people and NEVER wanting to walk into a room first as attention would then be put on me, I feel your pain… partially. I don’t know what it is but if I have to get up and speak in front of people, my fears go away- yes… AWAY! I get really passionate about what I’m talking about and my fears about people starring at me and talking about me go away. I’ve given a eulogy at a funeral, I’ve headed committee’s and in fact I even TEACH part time now. I still find it extremely hard to walk through stores on my own and public situations can still make me uncomfortable but I LOVE teaching my kids. So in a way I guess we are opposites- you can host people everyday in your restaurants, organize major events with thousands of people and be completely comfortable in your skin. I admire that about you- plus you’re so damn cute :) I’m sure you did an AWESOME job and hopefully you feel a little better about public speaking. Any time you need a cheering section- you call me!
Sooo where do we read all the nasty err great things they said about you and your talk?
@#2, Mike H That topic is coming up later……whahoo!
LOL!! @ Matt H “Fear of Public Spanking” so uh, will that be tomorrow’s blog…
Good for you! I don’t have a problem at all speaking in front of groups, but knowing plenty of friends that took public speaking with me in college, I can understand what you’re going through. I am somewhat surprised that someone like YOU, has that problem. You seem very outgoing and comfortable with yourself.
You didn’t seem really nervous at all when we interviewed you. You did a good job and and you didn’t crash and burn. To be honest, you didn’t really look 35. What do you eat to look younger?
@ Joseph,
I eat a very strict diet of pizza, Bombers tequila wings, thai food and cheeseburgers. And then I drink lots of fluids (vodka).
I would’ve loved 2 have been a fly on the wall..especially when that girl asked if you have a girlfriend!! Haha :)
if you ever have to do public speaking again…. try to get a prescription for inderal (generic name: propranolol) from your dr. It is harmless and it is for people with high blood pressure, but it keeps the heart from beating really fast, and you don’t really get the anxiety or dizzy spells, etc. Lots of performers take it, I take it for what I do. Ask your Dr and tell them what its for, and I bet they will have no problem with it!
( PS – I swear I’m not a pharmaceutical sales rep)
@#13, Mark M – What do you do?
Matt..should have did the ol “picture the audience naked” thing..thats what i do..ok even when i am not speaking ha ha
Matt,
based on your strict diet is that what we can expect for dinner tonight? Cause i’m good with it…especially the fluids (vodka) part!
I too have panic attacks during public speaking and um…being video taped.I was going to ask if I can borrow that book from Mike H. but I loathe reading as well.I’ll stick to the liquid stress relievers!
Wait so was your answer “I have a boyfriend” ? Please share, poor Mark never gets his fair amount of attention on here : )
@10 – Joseph,
Dont let him fool ya…he’s days of being 36!
So Matt –> just how did you answer the question about your having a girlfriend?? I am sure Mark would be interested in your answer too!
Hmmm … Mike, what the heck is on your mind. Matt, you didn’t say if you answered the “girlfriend” question. Did she look disappointed? You probably just picked up 35 new customers …
Hey Matt,
Thanks for coming to speak to our class. I thought you were GREEEAT! I’m the one who ask if you had a girlfriend, totally didn’t intend to make you feel uncomfortable at all sorry if i did.:(
I think your great! people who don’t are probly just envious of your success!
keep up the good work!
@ Mark…. Isn’t propranolol that stuff that took MJ down??
@20,
oh, I said, “I don’t have a girlfriend, I have a boyfriend named Mark, he lives in the city”. and the interview continued. it wasn’t that big a deal, but I’ve never been asked that question before in front of so many people I don’t know. I’m glad she asked it, though. (Hi Che’Ree!)
Thanks Matt – way to ruin my game when i’m in Albany…
Why is everyone so interested in what Matt’s answer was to the question “do you have a girlfriend”?.
seriously – why?
Of course he answered it – with the truth.
Did you expect he would pass out when asked that?
Be embarassed?
Cry?
@chris haha – no, that is propofol … TOTALLY different.
@colleen – I work in the media
So Matt – which are you more afraid of: speaking in public or spanking in public?
@ Chris V. I actually like public spankings.
Where can you get good copywriting classes? I hate it when I am stuck without any idea on how to write good copy for ads. My boss tells me that my choice of words aren’t good enough, or my words are too complex, or I don’t have the tone of the people I’m speaking to.. I mean, what the hell? As long as I’m writing good copy with interesting words, isn’t it enough? Maybe I need copywriting lessons. So, any idea where I can get copywriting lessons from an expert?